When did this happen?

Do you ever have those moments in your life when you are doing something and you think “how in the world did I get HERE”?  Here at this exact moment in your life when you have four kids and your putting one on the bus in the early morning, hoping and praying he has a good day and listens well.   Or when you are walking back to your house, looking at your neighbors well-kept yards and flowers, with a little pep in your step, so that you can go wake up the brother and sisters to get them going for the day only to do it all over again and put them on another bus and praying for them as the big orange rectangle takes them away.  And you think to yourself, how did I get HERE, at this exact moment, with four kiddos, a cat, a dog and a house in the suberb?

Mom

It’s these kind of days that when you are in the thick of it, you just want them to be over, for the weekend to hurry up and get here so that you can grab an extra hour of sleep before you start the day filled with soccer games, football games, a birthday party squeezed in and then dinner.  When three kiddos all yelling “mom!!!” and fighting each other or needing a band-aid and a kiss, or upset about what a friend said to hurt their feelings, that make you want to lock yourself in the laundry room to give a good cry (true story) before you come back out to face them all again.

mom2

It’s the kind of days when your neighbor’s daughter who is 22, comes home to visit, from where she moved after college to Kansas, and you think, I remember when we had those parents over for a cookout and she stood in our garage singing Brittany Spears when she was 10!  It’s when you look at her and think it’s gone, in the blink of the eye, all those years are gone and HERE is where you are.  Moving through life, taking all these little daily moments for granted and HERE is where life has brought you.  To the days where the kiddos still need you to talk openly and excitedly about their first crush on a girl in their class, to want you to still kiss their boo-boos away and who still need a 3rd drink of water before falling to sleep.  It’s HERE where you fall into bed at night utterly exhausted from the day, thinking that you would love to look at the new magazine that came in the mail today but you are just too tired.  It’s HERE where God has put you exactly where you supposed to be at this exact moment in your life, no matter how many times you think that you can’t do one more day by yourself while the hubby is at work, no matter how many tears are shed thinking that you are failing as a mother and the feeling guilty over the yelling that just happened, God has his hand tucked safely in yours and is watching over you.  He’s got this.  He’s got this.

About these ads

One thought on “When did this happen?

  1. must share! beautifully written Beth. Sometimes its ok to treat yourself too, you do know that don’t you? we find it hard to wrap our heads around that selfish concept… you feel guilty; but I went to france & left the girls w/ a friend! you moms today work outside the house out of necessity. the feminist movement did nothing to help women; only add to their guilt & pressures. decades later we can see what that brainwashing has done to society. hindsite is an adults tormenting guilt. Matra : i’m ok; it’s ok; we are all ok..thank you Lord.
    **feel free to delete but you ARE remarkable & should not have to shoulder so much alone. YOU are too hard on yourself so until you are drinking the afternoon away or using Molly daily or “stepping out” as we have both seen happen…YOU are the rock ~ God’s role for you at this time in your life. Later its fun to feel the results of your sacrifices, hard work & good intentions when your kids treat you like royalty; plan & prepare for your visits to the finest detail; send you heart wrenching cards w/ words that wrap your heart like a bandage…then you reap the joys of your attempted selfless acts & happy you taught them to laugh , don’t take thenselves too seriously , develop empathy & strength of character to not fall to temptations & believe that in their own way they know they are not alone either. :)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s